FEBRUARY 23RD 2006

People appear to be attracted to me for reasons I cannot explain. No, I'm not saying that in the sense that they knock themselves out to get my phone number or anything. When people have questions, they ask me. Even if they don't know me. Do I look like the Answer Lady or something?
Yesterday, we had a quiz in one of my classes and a girl that I don't know sat next to me instead of my friend Kristy, who was absent. I don't like sitting next to strangers; it increases my level of anxiety. Well, anyway, we're sitting there taking the test and she keeps asking me, "What'd you get for number three? What did you put down for number six?" I was so fucking irritated that I wanted to slap her, but I didn't. I just ignored her and scooched closer to Katie, who was on my left. Fuck you, bitch. I studied. You're not going to get a good grade off of me.
A couple of weeks ago, this person that I do not know came up to me in one of my classes and informed me that she had one of my other classes, a psych course. I was polite, but in my head I was thinking, "Yeah. And?" She said she had lost the study guide for the midterm and could she use mine to write down the study material? I didn't really mind that, so I started digging through my books when I realized that I had left those particular books at home. I was like, "Oh, I'm sorry...I left that at home." That should have ended it, right? No. She sat there waiting for me to offer to do something else, while I fidgeted uncomfortably. Keep in mind that there are at least three other people who are in that psych class and she didn't approach them. Fucking asshole.  I'm tired of people expecting you to wipe their ass for them.
Last semester, I took a really hard soc course, and we had quizzes every other week. They were open book and take home. When we met in class the day we turned in our quizzes, everyone would crowd around MY desk and ask me what I got for certain numbers. This I didn't so much mind, because most of those people worked pretty hard and it was cool to share ideas with people who were smart and ambitious. There were times when I learned something, too. But my whole point is, WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE? Why are people drawn to me like this? Sometimes I don't really mind, but other times I just want to scream LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! I would have loved this kind of popularity in high school but I'm grown now and all I want to do is graduate. Sheesh.
People turn helpless around me, too. A couple of weeks ago some friends of mine and I went out to eat. My friends hadn't sat down yet, but I had, so when the waitress came over, I ordered a beer. She asked me if the other two were with me and I said yes. She asked me if I knew what they wanted and I said no. She went and got my beer and by then my friends were at the table. They ordered something for themselves and then took off again. (They had spotted someone they went to high school with, that we all went to high school with, but I didn't recognize her and her voice was annoying so I just stayed in my seat.) The waitress was still writing down their orders when they walked away. I sat there sipping my beer and smoking. She looked right at me said, "So this is what they want?" "Uh, yeah, I presume so," I replied. "Well, should I put this order in now?" she asked. "Uh, I guess so." HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW? WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME? DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DO YOUR JOB? JESUS! And don't even get me started on other things, like so called customer service reps. Someone forgot to tell them how to go the extra mile. No one does that anymore, except me. Really, people, there is nothing wrong with giving service with a smile and going the extra distance to ensure customer satisfaction. For God's sake, don't make ME do it. I HATE telling people how to do their job. It is a BIG pet peeve of mine.
So needless to say, I have very little patience and I am a micromanager. Some say I may have a Type A personality. But why can't I just be set in my ways? There's nothing wrong with that.